Love and romance and its effect on athletics

Is it better for athletes to stick together when it comes to relationships or are there more benefits from being able to lean on someone from outside of the sport? Verity Ockenden examines affairs of the heart 

In sport, we often talk about the importance of the people we surround ourselves with. We are influenced to work hard if those around us are also working hard and we consciously seek good “team culture”, knowing that happiness, motivation and success become contagious given the right environment.

We live and breath our work, paying close attention to the minutiae of our daily routines, but we don’t often talk about the roles our personal relationships play in our careers. Understandably, the desire to maintain a certain level of privacy and professionalism around our romantic lives is what keeps this topic off limits most of the time, but that doesn’t lessen the impact that it can have on both an athlete’s wellbeing and their performance. 

Speaking from my own personal experiences, as well as listening to those of my peers, it’s clear that creating and maintaining healthy relationships while dedicating oneself to an ambitious goal has its complexities, and these vary from person to person, depending on their scenario.

One only need watch the concern with which Gjert Ingebrigtsen reacts to news of his sons’ relationships on their YouTube documentary in order to understand the gravity of their potentially disruptive consequences to the elite lifestyle.

It is an expenditure of energy that isn’t considered available to spare, and a potential catalyst to changing priorities. Embarking on a relationship (or deciding to leave one, for that matter) can feel like a leap into the unknown at the best of times, and belonging to a community that tends to value continuity and “control of the controllables” can make it seem even riskier.

However, as the Ingebrigtsen documentary goes on to show, making space for good relationships can actually also bring out the best in an athlete. As single-minded as we might like to be, most humans, at the end of the day, need love. 

Finding that love and keeping it isn’t always straightforward, though. Even with the best of intentions, most people make a bit of a mess of it along the way. For athletes, it becomes an even greater minefield.

By nature we can be a demanding, selfish, boring and frankly confusing lot. When dating, people’s preconceived…